Ever had one of those days where you feel like all the color off you is melting and you are just a murky grey canvas? Today was sunny, but I broke down. I fell apart. I screamed like I had never done before. You will never be satisfied my dear. No matter how hard I try to please you, you will find something else to wish for, to change. I am under so much stress and so much pressure - to be this elusive daughter you yearn for. Time is ticking, and you are still ticking me off. Like a bomb I exploded. I have nothing left in me, and I am sick of bearing the burden of the issues you don't want to own up to. I am leaving to change my life. 2013 will be my year. I know it. 2012 has been the year of many changes, but I hope it was just to shape me for the year to come. I am done feeling guilty for the way I am, for the things I say, and for what I want to do. Emotionally, you have filled me with anger, your constant un-acceptance of me has made me the person I am today. Has given me my strength and perseverance to do what I want. But I am done allowing you to break me. 

I need a damn happy song to get me out of this mood.*le sigh*.