I am drowining. I need to get some air. Back to my old habits again. Lost. I need to recompose. Need to re-adjust. What have I done? Why am I here? I hope this is just a bad day - but I see no hope at the moment. No. I can't quit. Quitting is easy. Who do I trust here? hang in there kitty cat. Hang in there. Sorry this is depressing. Maybe it's because I am getting older - which has never really phased me, but I feel like I am just wasting time. Wasting opportunities. I feel like I have just been placed in Dubai. With no direction.

I need to remember to be greatful. I need to just think about what matters. My parents. It feels like Utopia when I think that if it all turns to crap - I have a home to go back to. Some people don't have that. Remember your blessings. It's easy to complain. I'll be fine again. I memorized the quote below once upon a time:

“Trust me, it's paradise. This is where the hungry come to feed. For mine is a generation that circles the globe and searches for something we haven't tried before. So never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite and never outstay the welcome. Just keep your mind open and suck in the experience. And if it hurts, you know what? It's probably worth it.”




― Alex Garland